15 Comments

I Want to Rewrite Fatal Attraction

And make the rabbit break free before

the villain boils her. I want to brush

my hair with cinnamon. I want to find

wedding rings thrown from a bridge

in Reno. I want to touch a newborn

filly after she’s licked clean. I want to hold

the dozen roses my high school crush gave

to my best friend. I want to let a dairy

calf suckle my hand. I want to smell fresh baled

alfalfa in summer sun. And when the man

I want to love takes my hand, I want

to let him hold it then and now and never

care if others see or what they think

we do behind his door.

Expand full comment

Okay, when you get to those dozen roses--I wasn't expecting this best friend line. And l like the phrase "to let him hold it then and now and never" with the turn of the line there at "care" -- yes!

Expand full comment

Agreed, that line break with "gave / to my best friend" was exquisite.

Expand full comment

This is so great. Brush my hair with cinnamon, the wedding rings thrown from a bridge in Reno, these are all so evocative :)

Expand full comment

The way the title leads us in…brilliant!

Expand full comment

I want to hear my mother’s hello on the telephone one more time, just five more minutes, please.

I want to write you the storm before the calm.

I want my words to stop scratching at my sternum, but that means I need to write them.

I want the words to come out written

I want to live in a cypress tree, become the wind so I can travel unseen.

I want to dance in the aisles of the grocery store as I put Pop Tarts in the cart because they taste like my childhood.

I want sweet zest of lemon before I get to the bitter rind.

I want to read the patterns of the ocean in my coffee and frolic in the sea foam at high tide.

I want my tears to cleanse this pain so I can be the girl my mother loved.

Expand full comment

I want my words to stop scratching…gah, I actually felt that in my body ♥️

Expand full comment

"I want the words to come out written" <-- so relatable.

That last line is devastating. So good.

Expand full comment

The multi-sensory nature of this poem really got me. The line "become the wind so I can travel unseen" opened a space between realms. Haunting, in a good way. The ideas of tasting childhood and returning to girlhood to be loved again as a child, wow. My eyes dewed up.

Expand full comment

Great grief poem, I really feel the pain and longing in it. I love 'I want the words to come out written,' and how it fits expressing grief. Really any kind of strong emotion.

Expand full comment

I want to feel safe all the way

through. I want to be lifted, held

by something that wants nothing

from me. I want to spend my days

like a body floating the ocean, arms

spread to the sky, flying on the rise

and fall of my life. I want to tumble

into my next obsession with a raging

fire in my heart and a cool dedication

in my mind. I want to inhale knowledge

and excommunicate fear and feel all

my cells vibrating at the frequency

of creation—glorious, invincible, new.

**[Title?] I humbly request inspiration, insatiable motivation, and hardcore brilliance, in that order please.**

Expand full comment

The first sentence does it for me: I want to feel safe all the way through. Damn. I love how it says so much and also leaves so much unsaid.

"Arms spread to the sky" -- the absolute picture of freedom. Take me with you!

Expand full comment

A child of Desire, I’ve been wanting

my whole life. Wanted a gorgeous green

candle, an ephemeral turquoise dress,

a pink bear keychain. A pet dolphin and

the cool black shoes and emotions

other than shame and

invisibility

and through-the-wardrobe worlds

and most unrealistic of all, a sister.

Or anyone to have in my room

to giggle and talk after bedtime

like my brothers.

Now, I still want someone to share my room:

a partner before it’s too late for me

to have children. I want to speak five languages

or more. community that doesn’t leave.

to paint. to write. to publish.

a couch.

Most of all, I want the faith,

the discipline, the audacity to hope

until these things materialize. Maybe

that’s the real reason I need Magic

to visit this summer.

Expand full comment

Love the details in the opening stanza, especially the gorgeous green candle. And I love how the wanting a sister morphs into a desire for a life partner to have a family with

Expand full comment

My Magical Life

An unhurried steamy cup of sunshine, disguised as dark roast.

Body loving stretches,

maybe yoga, maybe qigong.

Letting the day unfold ideas,

nudging me to give them breath.

Maybe images, maybe words.

Getting lost in heart expression,

letting the messy in, giving it a home.

Breaking to bring me back to earth, my eyes closed, facing the sun.

Inhale. Exhale.

My favorite tote and I at the farmers market where communities are connected, abundance is shared, artists and artisans are supported.

I gather dinner.

My love joins me to chop and sauté and sip and smile and talk about the magic of ordinary days birthing an extraordinary life.

A walk on the beach, a bike ride through town, a hike in the woods. Hunting salt, and moss and breezes. Both lifts me up and grounds me.

Snuggled up on the couch

planning our next adventure:

A trip, a dinner with friends, a sleepover with the grands, a holiday with the family, an artist retreat.

But none more meaningful than this moment of fuzzy socks, hot tea, our legs and hearts, entwined. Dreaming.

Let’s dream some more under the covers. Safe. Content. Until tomorrow unfurls it’s passionate wishes, of which I’m happy to oblige.

Expand full comment